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Same-Sex and Gay Surrogacy: Yes! You Can Build a Family

Written by the PSED Team

January 11, 2025

Every family begins with a dream - a dream of love, connection, and belonging. For LGBTQ+ couples, surrogacy is a special way to create a family. It allows them to have a biological connection to their child.

Since 2015, we have been helping families through same-sex surrogacy, providing expert advice and personalized plans that make their journey smooth and rewarding.

What is Surrogacy for Same-Sex Couples?

Surrogacy provides LGBTQ+ parents with the opportunity to build a family while maintaining a genetic link with one or both partners. For gay male couples, gestational surrogacy is a popular option, leveraging advanced medical technology and offering comprehensive legal protections for intended parents.

This process typically begins with sperm donation and genetic testing, followed by selecting an egg donor, fertilizing the eggs through in vitro fertilization (IVF), and transferring the embryo to a gestational surrogate. Each step is thoughtfully designed to create a positive and seamless experience for intended parents.

The Key Stages of Surrogacy for Gay Couples

Sperm Donation and Genetic Testing

The surrogacy journey begins with sperm donation from one or both partners. Genetic testing ensures the health of the sperm and identifies the best candidates for fertilization. This initial step is crucial for a successful outcome.

Egg Donation

After genetic testing, intended parents select eggs from a pool of pre-screened donors. Donors undergo rigorous evaluations for health, genetic history, and personal traits to ensure compatibility. With guidance from PSED and trusted fertility experts at the Tree of Life Center (TLC) fertility clinic, intended parents find a donor that aligns with their family-building goals.

Fertilization and Embryo Transfer

During the IVF process, the donor's eggs are fertilized with sperm from the intended parent(s). The embryos are then transferred to a gestational surrogate, who carries the pregnancy to term. The surrogate has no genetic link to the child, simplifying legal arrangements and providing peace of mind.

Reciprocal IVF for Lesbian Couples

For lesbian couples, reciprocal IVF is a popular choice. One partner provides the eggs, while the other carries the pregnancy, using sperm from a donor. This process creates a unique biological connection for both partners.

How do Gay Men Choose Eggs for Surrogacy?

For gay male couples, choosing an egg donor is one of the most exciting and important steps in the surrogacy process. At PSED, we provide access to a detailed donor database, where intended parents can carefully explore profiles to find the right match for their family.

When browsing the database, many couples start by looking at physical traits like hair color, eye color, or height, especially if they want their child to resemble one of the biological fathers. Others focus on educational background, hobbies, or personality traits, looking for qualities they admire or feel connected to.

Health and genetic history are also key considerations. All donors go through medical and genetic screening, so intended parents can feel confident about the health of their future child. Cultural or ethnic background is another important factor for many, particularly for those who want their child to share a sense of heritage.

Some databases include childhood photos, personal essays, or even video interviews from donors, giving intended parents a better sense of who they are beyond the basic details. These extra touches often help couples make their final decision.

At PSED, we work closely with intended parents throughout this process, listening to what matters most to them and helping them find a donor who feels like the perfect fit. This personal approach ensures that every couple feels confident and excited about the journey ahead.

Is Surrogacy Legal for Gay Couples?

Yes, surrogacy is legal for gay couples in many parts of the United States. However, laws differ from state to state, so understanding the legal process is essential.

Some states, like California, Nevada, and Illinois, are particularly surrogacy-friendly and inclusive of same-sex couples. These states have clear legal frameworks that allow surrogacy agreements and ensure that intended parents are legally recognized from the moment their child is born.

When you start the surrogacy journey, one of the first steps is working with an experienced attorney who will guide you through the legal aspects. Here’s what they’ll explain:

  • Surrogacy Contracts: The contract is the foundation of the surrogacy process. It clearly outlines the roles, responsibilities, and rights of both the intended parents and the surrogate. An attorney ensures the contract is comprehensive and protects your interests.
  • Parental Rights: In surrogacy-friendly states, the law recognizes intended parents, regardless of whether they are biologically related to the child. This means both partners in a same-sex couple can be listed as parents on the birth certificate.
  • Pre-Birth Orders (PBOs): In states like California, your attorney will help you secure a pre-birth order. This legal document, issued before the baby is born, ensures that you are recognized as the legal parents at birth. It eliminates any uncertainty about your parental rights.
  • State-Specific Requirements: Some states may have additional requirements, like residency or medical evaluations, which your attorney will guide you through.

At PSED, we work closely with trusted attorneys who specialize in surrogacy for same- sex couples. They’ll make sure all the legal steps are covered, so you can focus on building your family without worrying about complications.

With the right guidance, surrogacy for gay couples is not only legal but also a safe and reliable path to parenthood.

Surrogacy-Friendly States for LGBTQ+ Families

The United States is one of the most surrogacy-friendly countries globally, particularly for gay couples. Among U.S. states, California stands out as a leader, offering progressive surrogacy laws and robust legal protections.

California provides same-sex couples with comprehensive support, including pre-birth orders and enforceable surrogacy agreements. Los Angeles is known for its innovation and diversity.

It also has top fertility clinics and surrogacy agencies. These clinics use advanced medical techniques. They understand the family-building needs of LGBTQ+ individuals very well.

Moreover, being close to skilled legal professionals guarantees that parental rights are well-defined, providing reassurance to intended parents. States like Nevada, Illinois, and New Jersey have good surrogacy laws. However, among gay surrogacy countries, California stands out for LGBTQ+ surrogacy. Its inclusivity and excellent resources make it the best choice.

Why Gestational Surrogacy for Gay Couples is the Preferred Choice?

Gestational surrogacy offers unparalleled benefits for same-sex couples:

  • Biological Connection: Gay couples can have a genetic link to their child through IVF.
  • Legal Security: Surrogacy contracts and pre-birth orders simplify the process of establishing legal parentage.
  • Emotional Fulfillment: The journey fosters a deep connection between intended parents, surrogates, and family members.
  • Proven Success: Gestational surrogacy, combined with advanced fertility treatments like IVF, provides same-sex couples with a reliable path to parenthood.

Understanding the Costs of Surrogacy for Gay Couples

The cost of surrogacy for gay couples can vary depending on a few main factors, like medical treatments, surrogate compensation, and legal services. Surrogacy is a big investment, and our goal is to help you feel confident and prepared every step of the way while exploring options for affordable gay surrogacy.

Here’s a breakdown of what goes into the cost:

  • Medical Costs: This covers IVF, embryo transfer, and prenatal care to ensure a healthy pregnancy.
  • Surrogate Compensation: Recognizes the surrogate’s time, effort, and dedication throughout the journey.
  • Legal fees: Includes drafting contracts and securing parental rights so everything is legally protected.
  • Agency fee: Covers coordination and management of the surrogacy program from start to finish.

We believe in transparency and clear communication. We’ll help you understand every detail so you can focus on what matters most, building your family.

Navigating Surrogacy Arrangements

Surrogacy arrangements are designed to meet the unique needs of same-sex couples. From the initial consultation to the finalization of legal parentage, our team ensures every aspect of your journey is handled with care.

We guide prospective parents through:

  • Matching with a surrogate mother who aligns with their values.
  • Drafting surrogacy contracts to protect all parties involved.
  • Navigating legal and medical requirements to secure a smooth path to parenthood.

Why Choose PSED?

Choosing a surrogacy agency isn’t just about services, it’s about finding a team you can trust with one of the most important journeys of your life. What sets PSED apart is the way we bring everything together, tailored matches, expert partnerships, and years of experience to make the process as smooth and meaningful as possible.

Tailored Matches That Go Beyond the Basics

Finding the right surrogate or egg donor is about more than ticking boxes. We take the time to understand what you value most, whether it’s shared cultural background, specific traits, or simply someone you feel a connection with.

Seamless Coordination with Top Experts

Work with some of the best fertility clinics (like TLC Fertility) and attorneys in the field, ensuring that every step of the process is handled with precision. You don’t need to worry about the logistics, we’ve got it covered.

Proven Success Stories That Speak for Themselves

Over the years, we’ve helped create countless families, and every one of them is proof of what’s possible. These aren’t just stories, they are milestones, celebrations, and futures made real.

Families who work with PSED don’t just get a service—they get a team that’s as committed to their dream as they are. When it comes to building your family, there’s no better choice.

Let’s Build Your Family Together

Becoming a parent is one of life’s greatest milestones, and our surrogacy agency in Tarzana is here to guide you every step of the way. Serving families across the San Fernando Valley and beyond, we specialize in creating personalized surrogacy plans that reflect your unique needs and vision.

Let’s make this journey together. Reach out today to learn how we can help turn your dream of parenthood into reality.

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